Originally published January 1, 2020. Most recent update: 03-07-2020
After I completed my Last 40 Days of My 40s adventure, I made a list of things I wanted to do in my 50th year. Some of these things were things I didn’t get to do in my Last 40 Days (a few have been revised), others were goals I was setting for myself or just things that I think sound awesome.
Here is my 50 and Fearless Goal List:
Finance – Save $1000 in an account as an emergency fund – DONE March 6, 2020 – it took me a couple of months, but I did it! I also put it in a different bank than more everyday transactional bank without a debit card so I can’t get to it too easily. Go me!
Finance – Pay off three debts using the Debt Snowball method
Volunteer locally
Road trip
Buy lottery tickets
Hire a spring cleaning service or lawn service
Make beauf bourginon
Climb Cascade and Porter
Girls weekend
Karaoke
No social media for 24 hours!
Host a tea party
Create something – Turn picnic table into funky art piece
Create something – Paint a mural on the old dog kennel wall
Do the 30 days to do a split challenge
Have drunk sex
Get Raised Beds ready
Plant fruit trees and bushes
First burlesque performance – DONE January 27, 2020 – this was empowering and life-changing!
Create something – paint stairway wall in chalkboard paint
Read 24 books
Goal weight achievement
Climb a volcano in Bali
Do water purification ceremony in Bali
Do yoga in Bali
Pet a monkey
Learn to make arroz con gandules that doesn’t taste like paste
Business – Make Creating Dreams Movement a 501(c)3 non-profit
Finance – start a Roth IRA
Finance – move all accounts to USAA
Business – earn $5000 from donmanuelpresents.shop
Do a 4 day weekend in Puerto Rico
Take 2 trips to see grandsons/son
1 absolutely spontaneous trip
Make 3 new friends…would be super awesome if one turned into a best friend
Take husband to see Ludacris in concert
BONUS: Hot air balloon ride
Check this blog for posts and updates on the 50 and Fearless goal list! Obviously, since this is me, I will be editing, revising, and adding to this list throughout the year. Because I can. Because it’s my life. Because really living is an adventure.
Since I devour books, I decided to call this series “Book Bites”…little book reports on yummy books!
I just finished “The Year of Less: how I stopped shopping, gave away my belongings, and discovered life is worth more than anything you can buy in a store” by Cait Flanders. It’s honest, thought-provoking, and inspiring.
In brief summary, the book documents Cait’s year of purchasing nothing except consumables (groceries, toiletries, gas for her car). She combined the no spending with decluttering, and got rid of 70% of her belongings! She learned how to fix things rather than throw them away, researched the zero waste movement, and learned to appreciate trying to live without an item before purchasing or replacing it. There are also lots of tips, tools, and advice if you want to try this yourself.
Why I loved it
Cait talks about retail therapy and spending like the self-destructive habit that it is; similar to over-eating, drug and alcohol consumption, or tv binge watching. She says, “Each time I craved it, I had to stand in the moment, pay attention to what had triggered the craving, and change my reaction.” That’s powerful stuff.
She also goes deep into understanding why she held on to things and purchased things. She talks about keeping things and buying things for the person she thinks she should be rather than the person that she actually is. Owning who she truly was helped her get rid of a lot of clutter. She says, “I realized I had spent the first 29 years of my life doing and buying whatever I could to be someone I thought I should be. I kept so many things, and consumed the wrong things, all because I never felt like I was good enough. I wasn’t smart enough or professional enough or talented enough or creative enough. I didn’t trust that who I was or what I brought to the table in any situation was already unique, so I bought things that could make me better. Then I spent a year sorting through the mess and figuring out who I really was.” That realization will really punch you right in the face! It was hard for me just to read and consider; let alone go through that process!
In the end, she calls on us to ask ourselves the question about our consumption and binging: what part of you or life feels like it’s lacking? Nothing you eat, drink, or buy can fix it. Instead, she says you have to simplify and strip things away and figure out what’s really going on. Cait says, “Falling into the cycle of wanting more, consuming more, and needing even more won’t help. More was never the answer. The answer, it turned out, was always less.”
I highly recommend this book! It’s inspired me, as part of my 2020 goal setting, to plan a No Buy July. I don’t think I’m ready to commit to a whole year, but a month sounds doable!
Reading is my favorite way to learn, to expand my mind, and to change my world view. I decided to create a list of books that really had an impact on me, and then I decided to share it. Enjoy!
Why I Adore It: Read this book. Read it again. And, every few years, read it again. Watch her Netflix special, her TED talk, and her Super Soul sessions with Oprah. Read her other books. Listen to her lectures. Brene Brown will open you up to courage, vulnerability, an understanding of shame, and, above all, love.
Why I Adore It: When I first encountered Calving and Hobbes, I fell immediately in love. I think it’s the first book that caused me to actually laugh out loud while reading it…and sometimes tear up a little. Both the words and the drawings are magical. I read it over and over again.
Why I Adore It: I’m sure you’ve seen memes about this everywhere and lots of videos, but I recommend reading the actual book! The KonMari Method works. In a nutshell, you gather up your belongings by category and then look at each one and ask yourself, “Does this spark joy?” If not, you chuck it. I’ve done my whole life! And…I try not to bring anything into my home without doing the “does this spark joy” check. The reason why this changed my life is because with less to take care of, there’s less to take care of!
Why I Adore It: This book created a desire…a yearning…in me to live the life I’d always wanted. It is a memoir of Liz’ journey to discover the arts of pleasure, devotion and spiritual exploration, and the balance between worldly pursuits and the divine…and she opened herself back up to love after heartbreak. What got me the most was how she learned how to love and listen to herself and to live unapologetically. She didn’t hide her struggle or her failures. It’s about self-discovery and self-recovery and what can happen when you take responsibility for your own contentment and stop trying to live according to society’s ideals. Lots of folks poo poo this book…those people are not my people.
I read this book when I was 17, and it blew my little smalltown girl mind. It’s smart, funny, satirical, and raunchy. It’s on this list not just because it opened my white bread eyes, but because it got me interested in his other books…which got me interested in social commentary, politics, and justice. Gonzo journalism at its best!
Why I Adore It: This book is raw and brutally honest. It’s a memoir about the author’s incredibly dysfunctional life after the death of her mother. She takes the leap to hike the Pacific Crest Trail alone with no experience. Cheryl’s story just spoke to my soul. Her use of humor and her willingness to brutally examine her life and take responsibility for doing something about it inspired me tremendously.
If you don’t know who Shonda Rhimes is, you’ve been living under a rock for the past 10 years. By all accounts, she’s wildly successful, and, yet, in this book she shares her fears…of being seen…of failing…of public speaking. After something her sister said, she committed to a year of saying yes to the things that scared her. This book chronicles that year. It’s amazeballs. It inspired me to do the same with my life. Say YES.
First of all, my favorite word is in the title. Manson makes the researched-based argument that improving our lives hinges not on our ability to turn lemons into lemonade, but on learning to stomach lemons better. This is a self-help book, but it’s a self-help book with humor and realism. This book challenges you to pay attention to what you give a fuck about, because we only have so many fucks to give! It really helped me to gather up my fucks and spend them on the things that are most important to ME and not where other people think I should spend them.
This book. Ouch. It’s a memoir about overcoming body image issues and food addiction. It’s about self-acceptance. And, it’s about realizing that it wasn’t food, other people, the media, ect…it was me all along. Yeah…that’ll take a minute.
A friend of mine recommended this book. Apparently, she likes to see me cry. I don’t want to give away the plot (and you can read it on Amazon), so I’ll just say my favorite line is: “Everyone joins a band in this life, only some of them play music.” It’s on this list because I’m not a religious person, but this book helped me understand I don’t have to be religious to be spiritual or to believe we’re all connected.
So, I didn’t really like Amy Poehler. I love Tina Fey, and I had read her book and liked it and she mentions Amy quite a bit in it, so I thought I’d give her book a try. It blew me away. Amy is fierce and ballsy and funny and righteous! But, what I loved the most is how fearless she is! It’s an absolute inspiration!
“Don’t be a chickenshit, Frances!” Do I need to say anything else? This phrase has become a mantra for my life. After reading this book, if I’m stuck or afraid, I ask myself if I’m being a chicken shit. If the answer is yes, that’s all the motivation I need to move forward!
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Holy Hannah! We discovered the LEGO Dragon Boat set was about to be retired, so we had to pick it up quick! We’ve really wanted the set, but other sets kept taking priority 🙂 Anyway, we got it! It is a colorful, creative, and fun build!
We love an evening spent building LEGO sets and then re-arranging our LEGO room, MOOROGEL, to include the new set.
The first step in the build is the reg Dragon Boat and its crew and buoy. They are ridiculously cute!
Before the boat was complete, we built a little sushi stand for the race watchers! This was a great little build with lots of printed pieces and a few stickers. The sign, in particular, is stickers.
Now, to finish the red boat! It’s totes awesome! We just loved the details on the head…the maroon croissant piece as the nose is genius (although, we kinda wanted to steal that and use it elsewhere, because we don’t have any other maroon croissants!).
Time to build the green Dragon Boat! It’s similar enough to the red boat but with different, unique details.
Then, we did an add-on for the sushi dock.
Judge and spectating areas…which are connected to the sushi stand!
And, it all comes together! A really, really fun set!
Notice anyone who doesn’t belong in this photo….?
That’s all for now. We highly recommend grabbing this set before it retires!
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As my 50th birthday approached on October 31st, I decided to do a Last 40 Days of My 40s bucket list. I felt fabulous and fearless about turning 50, but I still wanted to celebrate the last days of my 40s. My husband is super supportive, so we had a great time with my Last 40 Days list! I brainstormed a bunch of things I had always wanted to do and have never done or that I wanted to do again.
Here are the 40 things that I did:
Public belly dance performance – DONE
Cover up tattoo – DONE I had this crappy old tattoo with an ex. I got a beautiful cover up with things I love: books and lilacs!
Chicago tower glass floor – DONE 103 stories up in the air! So cool!
Eat something new – DONE I ate Wisconsin cheese curds…delish!
Do something daring with my haircut or color – DONE I put red streaks in my hair!
Drink my $150 bottle of wine – DONE Ok…I lost an earring, almost fell into a window, and passed out on my husband. But I did it!
Boudoir photo shoot – DONE I just can’t recommend this enough! It makes you feel sexy, beautiful, and badass! Go do it! Right now!
Get under 200 pounds – DONE
Speak at EDUCAUSE national conference – DONE Yes, I’m a boss babe.
Go skinny dipping again – DONE
Raise money for charity – Mission 22 Fun Run and Event – and did a Facebook fundraiser for my birthday – DONE I firmly believe in putting good out into the world every chance you get!
Choose and put a down payment on a 2020 vacation – DONE We’re going to BALI in March!!!!!
Teeth cleaning – DONE This is so important…and I had let it lag. Did you know gum disease is a leading cause of heart disease? Yeah…take care of your teefers!
Junk the crappy undergarments…get new sexy bras and panties – DONE
Join/start a book club – DONE
Dance class with Luis – DONE We’re taking salsa lessons. So much fun! It’s like group date night!
Cut people loose…Give myself permission to stop trying to connect with “friends” who don’t reach out to me…let go – DONE This one was hard…I’m a people-pleaser. But…nope. Not anymore.
Take a mental health day – DONE
Begin 21 Day Fix on October 7 – DONE
Break a bad habit – DONE I floss daily and don’t go to bed with makeup on my face anymore
Watch a documentary on an issue you don’t understand – DONE Oh Man. This might result in me becoming a vegan. Be careful what you know!
Have dessert without feeling guilty – DONE
Make a Will…again – DONE
Create “kevin’s favorite recipes” book (apple salad, super chicken, awesome chicken, red white and blue pie, banana bread, pulla bread, ect) – DONE I took all of my son’s favorite recipes and put them in a book for his girlfriend and his sons.
Wear red lipstick – DONE
Pierce nose – DONE I was afraid to do this for 20 freaking years. Didn’t hurt at all! So embarrassing….
Organize my closet – DONE Anything that didn’t fit had to go!
Check my credit report – DONE
Begin Composting – DONE
Find someplace in the house to make a sanctuary for myself – DONE This took some creativity, but I did it…and I’m really happy with the space!
Dance on a bar – DONE I highly recommend doing this too! I chose Lizzo to dance to….
Create budget…get finances in order – DONE
Try CBD – DONE
Acquire the LEGO Corner Garage – DONE My husband can tell you just how long I coveted the Corner Garage! It’s now happily installed in Moorogel
Attend ComicCon in costume! – DONE I mean, if you’re going to attend ComicCon, you HAVE to cosplay!
Meet James Marsters – DONE Oh my fangirl heart will never recover!!!!!
See Hamilton – DONE This was a “bonus” item as I didn’t think there was any way I’d be able to accomplish this. I should have more faith in me!
Try Fire Cupping – DONE A wicked cool experience!
Burlesque boas and gloves – DONE
Makeup lesson – Ready for My Closeup with Jo – DONE
These are the things I didn’t do that I will try to do in my 50th year:
Have a say “yes” night with friends
Pay off one debt
Volunteer locally
Road trip
Buy lottery tickets
Hire a spring cleaning service or lawn service
Make beauf bourginon
Learn Spanish…
Climb Cascade and Porter
Girls weekend
Karaoke
No social media for 24 hours!
Host a tea party
Create something – Turn picnic table into funky art piece
Go to a movie alone.
Do the 30 days to do a split challenge
Have drunk sex
Get Raised Beds ready
BONUS: Hot air balloon ride
All-in-all, this was an incredible experience!!!! I highly recommend CELEBRATING your milestone birthdays! As my shirt says, “Don’t die wondering!”
Have you heard about the awesomeness that is Elderberry Syrup? It has so many health benefits! Now, I’m not a doctor, so don’t take my word for it…go do some research! Google Elderberry Syrup, Elderberry Syrup and flu prevention, and Elderberry Syrup and reduced cold duration and symptoms. Go…I’ll wait.
Convinced? Ok. So let’s make some Elderberry Syrup in the Instant Pot so you can have it done in 20 minutes!
Don’t have an Instant Pot? You can get one on Amazon. This is the one I have:
You also need dried elderberries. My local health food store didn’t have them, so I ordered them from Amazon too!
Ok…let’s go! Ingredients: 2 cups dried elderberries 8 cups water 2 cinnamon sticks (or more if you really like cinnamon…and it’s super good for you!) 2 cups RAW honey
Put everything except the honey into your Instant Pot. Seal it up and set it for high pressure for 20 minutes.
When it beeps, do a quick release and then open it up and let the mixture cool to almost room temperature. Then, strain the mixture using a very fine strainer or a strainer lined with cheesecloth.
You’ll have a bunch of gorgeous elderberry liquid left. To this liquid, add your 2 cups of raw honey and stir it in completely.
That’s it! Put your awesome and delicious elderberry syrup into mason jars and store in the fridge! It will be good for 4 months.
You can take it one of two ways:
At the first sign of cold or flu, take 2 Tablespoons every 4-6 hours.
Or, daily dosage: take 1 teaspoon daily.
Enjoy!
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Don Manuel and I just returned from our first New York ComicCon…and we had an incredible time! One of our highlights was getting in to the see Wonder Woman Bloodlines before anyone else in the world! In fact, most of the cast was there, and they were seeing it for the first time also! An absolutely amazing experience! The movie screening was followed by a panel discussion with some of the cast, the director, writer, and producers.
Wonder Woman Bloodlines is now available worldwide. You can get it here:
First off, I have to say that Bloodlines is a well-written, emotional movie. Rosario Dawson, who voices Wonder Woman, cried several times. Don Manuel and I got teared up several times. Don Manuel says this is now his favorite Wonder Woman portrayal. I’m still a fan of Gal Godot, but this is definitely a close second!
The movie traces Wonder Woman’s origin story. We don’t believe in doing spoilers, so I’m going to leave it at that. Get the movie! Watch it! Watch it two times!
Now for the amazing Wonder Woman Bloodlines panel!!! Rosario Dawson as Wonder Woman, Marie Avgeropoulos (The 100) as Silver Swan, Adrienne C. Moore (Orange Is the New Black) as Etta Candy, Mozhan Marno (The Blacklist, House of Cards) as Dr. Cyber, and Courtenay Taylor (Regular Show, Fallout 4) as Dr. Poison. Producer Sam Liu (Reign of the Supermen) and Justin Copeland (Batman: Hush) co-direct from a script by Mairghread Scott (Justice League Action). James Tucker (Batman: Hush) is executive producer.
We were blown away by the openness, honest, passion, and love for Wonder Woman that the whole panel felt. We did record it, so you can watch it here:
Live at NYCC for the world premiere of Wonder Women Bloodline
So, folks, if you’ve been thinking about attending San Diego or New York ComicCon…GO!!!! The opportunities for incredibly cool nerdy stuff are endless!
If you know me at all, you know that I have developed a passion for Spanish food over the past year or so. I am OBSESSED!!! It’s really difficult to get Spanish food near where we live, so I began learning how to cook the things I love most: rice and beans, empanadas, pernil, carne bif…I could go on.
Why is this absolutely delicious rice and beans dish called Becky Rice and Beans? Because I can’t actually cook rice. I use a rice cooker. So, my Puerto Rican husband says I can’t call them Puerto Rican rice and beans if I’m making Becky Rice. Since I have an inappropriate sense of humor most of the time, I named the whole recipe Becky Rice and Beans 🙂
Here we go!
First off, put your Goya Rice in your rice cooker! 🙂
Do not be the least bit ashamed if you make Becky rice like me! Someday, I’m sure I’ll get the hang of making great Puerto Rican rice…today is not that day.
While the rice is doing it’s thing, let’s make the beans! Here’s what you need:
1 Tbs oil 2 big heaping Tbs Goya Sofrito 8 oz Goya tomato sauce 2 cans (15-16 oz each) pink beans – drained and rinsed 1 1/2 cups water 1 packet Goya Sazon with Culantro and Achiote 1 packet Goya Jamon 1 tsp Goya Adobo 1/2 tsp garlic powder 1/4 tsp dried oregano Black pepper to taste 2 Tbs Manzanilla pimento-stuffed olives, sliced (I use Goya) (the olives are optional) 1/2 pound of potatoes peeled and diced
Here’s what you do: In a pot, saute the Sofrito in the oil over medium heat for about 2 minutes. Now, it says, 2 big heaping tablespoons of Sofrito…I use closer to a 1/4 cup of the stuff, because I love it.
After you’ve sauted the Sofrito…EVERYBODY IN THE POOL! Seriously, toss in everything else except the potatoes and the olives. Then, give it a taste. It should taste slightly salty, and you want it to be like that, because the potatoes will absorb a lot of the seasoning.
Add the potatoes…and the olives if you like them. Sometimes I add olives, sometimes I don’t. Sometimes I feel like a nut, sometimes I don’t. You do you!
Now, bring this pot of awesomeness to a simmer and let it cook until the potatoes are done…about 30-40 minutes. Stir it occasionally.
When it’s done, it will be thick and delicious!
To serve, get your Becky rice. Look at how perfect that is!
Put the rice on the bottom of a bowl and layer the beans on top!
I hate wasting food. I get super creative using up leftovers, because my family doesn’t seem to like just eating leftovers. I like to take them for lunch, but that’s not always enough not to waste food. Recently, I made a big pork roast and didn’t know what to do with all the leftovers. When I don’t have a solid plan, I dump everything in the fridge into a baking dish and call it a casserole! Here’s my latest creation.
This is a dump casserole. I wanted rice for this casserole. I am a fantastic cook, but I can’t make rice. It either comes out too mushy or too crunchy. So, I invested in a rice cooker! Heck yes! Perfect rice every time. I got this one off of Amazon:
I made two cups of rice for this recipe. You’ll want to combine your rice and your leftovers…I had the pork and peas. People in my house don’t really like peas, so I hide them in casseroles 🙂 I also added about a cup of cheddar cheese, a can of cream of mushroom soup, about a half cup on french fried onions, and a cup of milk. Smush it all together and pop it in a baking dish.
Bake this beauty for about 30 minutes at 400 degrees. Then, top it with a bunch more cheddar cheese and the rest of the can of french fried onions. Bake for another 10 minutes until the cheese is melted and the onions are browned. Enjoy!
So don’t be afraid to dump the contents of your fridge in a pan and tie it together with cheese!
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If you don’t live in down south, you probably grew up drinking unsweetened iced tea. Why do we do that up here in the north? I mean, we already have to deal with snow and ice and a higher cost of living and more taxes…so why would we take the sugar out of our iced tea?!
My husband is absolutely in love with sweet tea, and we only get it on our trips down south. Placed up north that say they serve sweet tea are liars. Recently, I thought to myself, I have access to all the powers of the internet…I must be able to figure out how to make authentic southern sweet tea!
Well, butter my butt and call me a biscuit, I sure did figure it out! And now I’m going to share it with you so you don’t have to spend hours on the interwebs and experimenting!
What you need: — 3 cups Sugar — 1/8 teaspoon Baking soda — 3 Lipton family size tea bags or 12 regular tea bags — water 🙂 Note: I can’t find Lipton family size tea bags where I live, but I just discovered you can get them on Amazon!
My husband is an addict, so this recipe makes a gallon of sweet tea. Get yourself a gallon size pitcher or cut the recipe in half if you want less (but why would you want that?).
Ok! Here’s what you do. Put 4 cups of water in a pot over high heat on the stove. When it begins to boil, turn off the heat but leave the pot on the stove, add your tea bags, and the baking soda. Yes, I said baking soda. Turns out, it removes the bitter taste from the tea. We don’t want bitter tea…we want sweet tea!
Now, leave it alone to steep for 15 minutes. Not 14 minutes, really not 10 minutes…15 minutes! While it’s steeping, add 12 cups of water to your pitcher…and maybe clean your kitchen or something so you’re not tempted to mess with the tea early.
Get ready to add the sweet to your sweet tea!
After 15 minutes, scoop out all of your tea bags and give them a squeeze to get all the tea out of them. Then, add 3 cups of sugar to the hot tea. Yes, 3 cups. Don’t let me find out you added less, because you’re like “I don’t like things too sweet.” Shut the front door. You should have a little sugar mountain in your tea!
Now, stir that sugar into the tea until it is dissolved. Once that sugar is all absorbed, add your tea mixture to the water in you pitcher and stir it all together. You’re done! I promise you, you won’t have better sweet tea unless you have a southern gramma who’s making it for you! Enjoy!
Let me know if you try this recipe and what you thought!
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